HappyMama

BIRTH ORDER OF  CHILDREN - a forward we received recently from Mark&Carrie

1st baby: You begin wearing  maternity clothes as soon as your OB/GYN confirms your  pregnancy.

2nd baby: You wear your regular clothes for as long  as possible.

3rd baby: Your maternity clothes ARE your regular clothes.

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>Preparing for the  Birth:
>
>1st baby: You practice your breathing  religiously.
>2nd baby: You don’t bother because you remember that  last time, breathing didn’t do a thing
>3rd baby: You ask for an epidural in  your eighth month
>______________________________________________________

>The  Layette:
>
>1st baby: You pre-wash newborn’s clothes,  color-coordinate them, and fold them neatly in the baby’s little bureau.
>2nd baby: You check to make sure that the clothes are clean and discard only the ones with the darkest stains
>3rd baby: Boys can wear pink, can’t  they?

Worries:
>1st baby: At the first sign of distress–a whimper, a  frown–you pick up the baby.
>2nd baby: You pick the baby up when her wails  threaten to wake your firstborn.
>3rd baby: You teach your three-year-old how to rewind  the mechanical swing
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>Pacifier:
>
>1st baby: If the pacifier falls on  the floor, you put it away until you can go home and wash and boil  it.
>2nd  baby: When the pacifier falls on the floor, you squirt it off with some juice from the baby’s bottle.
>3rd baby: You wipe it off on your shirt and pop it  back in.
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Diapering:

>1st baby: You change your baby’s  diapers every hour, whether they need it or not.>
>2nd baby: You change their diaper  every two to three hours, if needed.
>3rd baby: You try to change their diaper before others start to complain about the smell or you see it sagging to their  knees.
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Activities:
>
>1st baby: You take your infant to  Baby Gymnastics, Baby Swing, and Baby Story Hour.
>2nd baby: You take your infant to  Baby Gymnastics.>
>3rd baby: You take your infant to the supermarket and  the dry cleaner.
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Going  Out:
>
>1st  baby: The first time you leave your baby with a sitter, you call home five  times.>
>2nd baby: Just before you walk out the door, you remember to leave a number where you can be reached.
>3rd baby: You leave instructions for  the sitter to call only if she sees blood.

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At Home:
>
>1st baby: You spend a good bit of  every day just gazing at the baby.>
>2nd baby: You spend a bit of everyday watching to be  sure your older child isn’t squeezing, poking, or hitting the baby.>
>3rd  baby: You spend a little bit of every day hiding from the  children.
>______________________________________________________

Swallowing  Coins (a kid’s favorite):
>
>1st child: When first child swallows a coin, you rush  the child to the hospital and demand x-rays.
>2nd child: When second child  swallows a coin, you carefully watch for the coin to pass.>
>3rd  child: When third child swallows a coin you deduct it from his allowance.